Life Bits

On Moving On From A Good Person

“Sometimes you just have to accept the fact that some people only enter your life as temporary happiness.”

Love is beautiful, peaceful, and sometimes confusing. At least that is what it has been for me. However, what happens when things don’t go as we imagined? When you have done your best yet, certain events remain unresolvable? You move!

Moving on is a difficult thing to do, especially when a person is a good person.
I have been there. I got out of a relationship some months back, and it was one of the most challenging decisions I’ve taken in recent times.

It’s hard to let go of what you cherish, what you consider rare and perfect. The fantasies you’ve let build in your head and the future you have planned together.

Sometimes, you need to accept that love is not enough for a relationship to thrive; there is compatibility, patience, emotional maturity, understanding, and discipline to name a few.

When you start thinking of leaving your relationship, something is wrong, and you are not imagining or overthinking. We, women, are blessed with an intuition that sometimes gets lost in a sea of what if’s and maybes.

Moving on is hard but not impossible.

5 steps to moving on

Accept the reality and believe your reason is valid

Moving on is hard if the person was mistreating you, much more if everything was right and somethings you can’t change gets in the way.

My Ex was a dream come true, and when we found out we were both of Genotype AS, a part of us wanted to risk it because of love. But in this case, love is not enough.

We decided to split for the future of our kids. I could not stand the worry and what if things don’t go right thoughts.
We had to accept that the reason was valid because it was.

Cut off contact

I often hear people say cutting off contact with your Ex is childish. Childish? If anything, it shows you understand yourself, and you’re ready to decide to let go of that person and anything that reminds of your ex till you’re in a better place.

Unfollow them on social media if you must. So, you can breathe better especially if it was a toxic relationship.

Be selfish with your sanity, be selfish with your decision to move on, and protect your mental health.

Accept the past and note the lessons

You have to come to peace with your past relationship. The process, what failed, what changed and what hurt you the most.

It is perfectly fine to be angry about certain things, but anger does not help you; especially when you direct it to yourself. Statements of regret, “I should have known better,” “I should have listened to my friends and family.” Stop it.

You need to let all that go, it won’t be easy, but anger and regrets draw you backward, it is a toxic emotion you don’t need.

Forgiving is for no one but yourself; it frees you, it makes you feel lighter and better.
Forgive them, forgive yourself. Breathe.

Change circles

If certain people don’t think you did the right thing by moving on, you need to let them go too. If you’re a naturally hopeful person, your mind tends to draw back seeking for answers where it’s a closed case.

Having people who continuously make you regret your actions only brings the worst out of you.
Take time off for yourself.

It’s okay to love them still

When moving on a lot of us tend to hide our emotions or lie that we are over our ex when we are not.
It’s okay to love them, being in denial would not make you move forward.

Love is beautiful. There are different types of love and love can shift. That romantic love you feel can evolve into something else and if it doesn’t remember to take your time and don’t lie to yourself.

Will it be difficult for you? Hell yes! However, you would look back on these steps you took and be thankful. You deserve the type of love you give and the relationship you desire.

I wish you all the best!

Love and Light



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Olotu Funke is a baddie keen on existing fully, documenting her journey with Skin Positivity, Mental Health, Personal Style, and the Life in between.

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