Female Development and Style

girl child about sex

Sex education is not just a talk, it’s a series of conversation. A lot of girls like me never really got educated about sex apart from the ‘if you get close to a boy you will get pregnant’ talk, the girl child should be educated about sex depending on their age, the questions they ask and as puberty hits, help them understand their desires, why they think and feel how they feel and not shame them.

Age to Age guide of talking to your kids about sex

Teenagers are really sensitive toward changes in their appearance during puberty and with the onset of puberty, they would experience stress and negative feelings such as fear, tension, shame, and embarrassment. Increased awareness about these changes for teenagers is very important. –  Effect of peer education in school on sexual health knowledge and attitude in girl adolescents

It’s very important that girls are talked to and guided throughout this phase in their life, very important, this is where a lot of parents lose their kids. That’s one of the reasons why there are a lot of badly behaved kids all over the internet today don’t even get me started on the cash me outside girl and her folks. If a parent is open to talking about sex, I bet that parent is ready to talk about everything bothering the child.girl child about sex

There are a lot of reasons why parents don’t educate their daughters sexually and one that keeps being said is because the parents can’t bring themselves to talk about sex, they find it awkward so they’ll rather shy away from the topic, some are scared that if they educate their daughters about sex, they may want to practice it, parents believe if they don’t mention sex until they are much older, the child will never think about sex, and then will never do it, this is like shooting yourself on the foot, some because they are embarrassed about their sex life and things that happened to them in the past. Well, this is 2018. If you don’t teach your kids about sex, someone/ the internet will and most certainly not in the right way.

It takes a certain type of strength for girls that are not educated about sex not to make terrible mistakes with sex.

girl child about sex

5 alarming effects of not educating the girl child about sex

  • A sense of guilt/discomfort/shame

A lot of parents make it clear that they are not comfortable about talking about sex because they don’t talk about it or they give shallow response to their children’s question and as stated earlier the teenage years are very curious ones, when their hormones start acting up and they can’t talk about it or have been taught to never have sex (you can’t just tell a girl not to have sex without giving her the right education about it, you need to give her the why, and the repercussions of her decision, peer pressure is very real! Almost everyone is having sex these days, you need to do better to make sure she makes the right sex decisions in her life).

girl child about sex

  • Early exposure to pornography and sex

Jean Smith, a mom of three in Aurora, Ont., was helping her 10-year-old daughter with a school project, she typed in the words “girls playing” on the computer. “You wouldn’t believe what came up,” she says. “It was shocking!” – Today’s parent

  • Holding on to rape and sexual abuse

If their parent was not there to talk about the basic things about sex how will they react to the news of sexual harassment or rape, will they make her feel better, worse, ashamed? In a society that constantly blames women for rape or sexual assault, the easiest thing to do is hide away and not talk about it. It’s easier when there has been no prior conversation about sex, how their bodies biology works, how to smell sexual predators, how it’s not their fault if they are harassed or raped, just talk to them, please. A lot of terrible things are going on in the world and lack of education is not an answer. What you don’t know can and in fact will kill you.

It also increases their risk of sexual assault, if a 4-year-old girl knows that her skirts should be down and no uncle should touch her there, taught to scream, she will most likely do that or talk to her parent if this terrible thing could not be prevented so she can get treatment immediately and it won’t happen again.

girl child about sex

  • Wrong advice with contraceptives and pregnancy

Young people are having sex despite being told not to and given different reasons not to, it’s safer and better to talk about contraceptives even if you’re advising your girl child not to have sex, explain which is better, the emergency pill (a kind of birth control that can help prevent pregnancy up to 5 days after unprotected sex) in case of rape or unprotected sex, tell them everything to know about contraceptives. If they cannot open up about pregnancy to their parents They will get the wrong information from their friends and a lot of girls are wilding when it comes to abortion yo! Taking hot drinks and dry gin, using an iron bucket (I kid you not) all these terrible things that can damage their body

What you should know about birth control

  • Out of control/ death

I mentioned earlier that conversing about sex means there is a bond between the girl child and her parents; it opens the floor for other mind-boggling issues regarding their body image, bullying, drugs, friendships, social media, and their career. Mental illness is real and there is nothing like having your parent by the corner. A lot of kids don’t have that so they feel lonely, get exposed to drugs, get out of control and can lead to their death.

girl child about sex

Sex may not be the most comfortable subject to discuss with your daughter but it is certainly an important one that can change her life in amazing ways.

which other effect do you think lack of educating the girl child about sex can cause? have any tips for parents reading this? share your knowledge and improve the quality of a girls life


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  • Posted June 18, 2018 9:12 pm
    by Dupe

    Great post. I was really educated about sex. #AfricanParentsPalava.
    But I don’t blame them because even me with all my exposure, I’m still not sure of how I’ll speak to my kids about it.

    • Posted June 18, 2018 9:13 pm
      by Dupe

      I meant I wasn’t really educated about sex.

    • Posted June 18, 2018 9:19 pm
      by thefunkeolotu

      The first link in the post is link to an article that will help you do that.
      There are also great articles that you can read. It’s really important and I hope you get the strength to do it ?

  • Posted June 18, 2018 9:22 pm
    by Eno

    This is so true. I couldn’t agree more with the wrong contraceptive advice.
    Great post funkster!

    • Posted June 18, 2018 9:24 pm
      by thefunkeolotu

      Thank you Eno? Funkster always cracks me up

  • Posted June 18, 2018 9:30 pm
    by Candace

    Wow! Such an awesome and good write up.
    Keep it up dear.

  • Posted June 18, 2018 9:49 pm
    by Oma

    I wasn’t educated about sex. I really dunno why. Even when terrible stuffs happened to me while I was much younger, I couldn’t tell my mum, (I was never close to her).
    I won’t make the same mistakes with my children though. I feel like I should make sticky notes of the points in this post n paste on the doors of every parent lol.

    I love this post Funke, you really deserve some accolades.

    • Posted June 18, 2018 9:56 pm
      by thefunkeolotu

      Thank you so much Oma. So sorry about that. Our mothers generation were not educated about sex so the generation of silence continued. Ours will make a difference.

      Hope you’re doing good and you can share the post so they can take note ??

  • Posted June 19, 2018 6:33 am
    by Tamunotonye Barimalaa

    I’m very thankful to my mum for educating me about sex. When I was much younger, I had a friend that never had ‘the talk’ with her mum. She said her mother will beat her if she talked about such things. Meanwhile, I have had series of talks. Everything I learnt from my mum, I started telling her. I had an incident where an older person touched me, just touch I didn’t think twice. I told my only mother because I knew she will understand and she took the right measures. Mothers need to do better and make all their children their friends, that way it a win-win relationship. First as their mother, and then as their best friend. Then there will be no form of shying away from serious conversations.

    Lovely post you have here!❤️


    • Posted June 19, 2018 7:08 am
      by thefunkeolotu

      Your mother is so amazing and it’s so beautiful that you shared your knowledge. This is so beautiful ?
      You’re right about the mother and best friend thingy ??

      Thank you Tonye

  • Posted June 19, 2018 10:09 am
    by Debs

    I really have a lot to say about this topic but it would mean me baring all so many dirty linen public. However, one resolve i have made with myself is to teach my kids about sex education very early in life and make them extremely comfortable about it, that way, discussion around it would not be so sacred, hence making them make mistakes.

    • Posted June 19, 2018 2:40 pm
      by thefunkeolotu

      Yes Debbie. I’m just happy I know future mothers that will do this?

  • Posted June 19, 2018 9:39 pm
    by Cirphrank

    This is just so TRUE! I will even do the talking to about sex to my girl child if my wife will agree that I do it with her, as for the boys, no way the are going to escape discussing about that girl and their urges with me, they need to learn early enough that their third leg is not meant for walking into every skirt.

    Nicely written. Kudos.

    • Posted June 19, 2018 9:58 pm
      by thefunkeolotu

      Third leg ??? is that what you call it? Such a good spirit, amazing

      • Posted June 22, 2018 11:36 pm
        by Cirphrank

        That’s how we that have not spoil call it o, don’t tell mummy I was here please.

  • Posted October 20, 2019 6:43 pm
    by Davidson Davianey

    Hmmmm this knowledge needs to be circulated 👏

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